The wonderful thing about the modern age is that all of us generally have tons of information and services at our fingertips.
In the United Stated for example, we have access to all types of information at blazing speed, a ginormous health care apparatus, and a zillion options to handle almost anything ailing us. And yet, given all this, you could still have an anxiety relapse.
In other words, you can know all there is to know about your condition, take meds, have access to world class widgets, and all the rest of it and days, weeks or even years later anxiety can hit your grey matter as fast as the rotation of a pulsar (i.e., super fast).
You could have been feeling fine for a long time and may have even forgotten about your hellish experience with anxiety but can suddenly find yourself in the midst of a panic attack and start wondering … what the hell is going on?
In my experience most people that search for anxiety related issues on the internet are having an anxiety relapse after a lull in symptoms.
Or it could be that their symptoms lessened in intensity but now have increased exponentially without any known cause. So why does this happen?
Why? Why you? Why now? Let me ask you a question: Why does knowing the cause even matter? In my view this is a waste of energy and produces more stress. You could chase your tail for decades and never know why.
Anxiety disorders generally occur because of a string of complex connections between your genes, your environment, your thought processes, your biases, false beliefs, assumptions, brain chemistry, and thinking errors.
So there you go, but chewing on these facts won’t help you cope.
Honestly, and you might hate me for saying it, anxiety disorder is generally a life long ailment. You could be the lucky winner of a totally anxious free life, but chances are that you will end up like the majority of people with an anxiety disorder that don’t get a winning ticket.
This doesn’t mean however that you can’t cope effectively. So let’s not get too grim about this whole thing.
The truth is that words like ‘coping’ and ‘management’ are much stronger than you think. So although anxiety disorder does tend to be chronic, that is long term, you can make drastic improvements by learning how to manage your condition.
With proper treatment and effort on your part you can cope effectively so that anxiety does not rule your life. If you’re able to cope effectively then you’ll be able to live your life anxiety free most of the time.
Keeping the proper perspective and the appropriate level of expectation is the key to handling this situation. You must understand that anxiety will raise its ugly head again and again. If you understand this- truly accept it as reality – then you’re more likely to respond in a healthy way. It’s a bitter pill to swallow but it’s true.
In terms of dealing with anxiety relapses the game plan stays the same. In fact, it would be beneficial to incorporate the things that help you cope with anxiety into your daily life.
So don’t just exercise, eat healthy, meditate, deep breath, see a therapist and use all the other tactics you implement just when you’re consumed with feelings of intense anxiety. Think mitigation.
You have to make coping skills a part of your life, and when necessary, ramp up the intensity of your efforts to counter the effects of the recurring spikes of anxiety that you will have throughout your life.
I would say hey just keep the stress down and you’ll be alright, but that’s not a realistic approach. After all, if you’re alive you are, at least to some degree, stressed out about something or other almost always.
My advice is that you should maintain your anti-anxiety regimen as I outlined above but also make sure that you don’t blow things out of proportion when a relapse occurs.
This is a huge problem with anxiety sufferers. They tend to escalate things to their extreme with expeditious haste then find themselves in a pit of misery and uncertainty. No need for all that.
Have a frank discussion with yourself one of these days, especially if you’re having an anxiety relapse right now. Tell yourself that anxiety does not kill, anxiety will not make you go crazy, and the spike that you’re having will subside. Challenge yourself to not give in to false beliefs created by your scared mind.
Ultimately having anxiety is … what’s the word, Arrghhh. That’s not a word but its a feeling I’m sure you get a lot. Just frustration, anger, worry and fear, pure blah. Again, despite this you have to stay focused on the reality that anxiety is a chronic condition that can be managed and will not cause heart attacks in and of themselves.
Try not to get stuck and lost just because you encounter setbacks, it happens. Don’t beat yourself up because this is not your fault – you’re not weak, you’re not dumb or crazy, simply anxious.
Some people have herpes (sorry kind of gross), others bad knees and so on, well you got ‘bad nerves’. Don’t get sucked into any pity parties and be patient because you will bounce back. Just remember what good ole Confucius once said “Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but rising every time we fall”.
I really like this post. I was just coming on here because I had been feeling anxious for no clear reason since I woke up this morning.
It seems every other week or so I will again get that fear of going crazy, and I have to simmer down and repeat all the things I already know, yet my brain somehow refuses to believe. It’s a battle!
Hey Seana, it is a battle. But one that you can certainly win. It takes time and patience, but it can be done.
This is a great post. Its honest and speaks directly to me, without glossing over the details. Very helpful.
Thank you for this article. Haven’t been feeling on my game as of late. A lot of unfortunate things have happened as of late, along with cutting out one of my meds, clonazepam, which have combined left me feeling anxious, weak and bothered by my own thoughts. I know the difference , yet reading this article just re-confirmed what has gotten me this far over the last 4 years. Thank you
You’re welcome Cyril. =)
Paul
Arrghhh..good word for it! My anxiety has become terrible in the last few months since my brother passed away. I try to remind myself that I’ve been through this so many times (I’ve had anxiety/panic issues since childhood) and will get through it, but there are days when I am so overwhelmed and exhausted it’s hard to believe it. But reading that setbacks are normal helps…thanks.
are you trying trigger people’s anxieties? you are saying some really horrible things in this article, and with what medical knowledge? probably not anything professional
first of all, there have been multiple people who’s anxiety has been cured. there’s just no way to determine if it’s permanent since some people have relapsed. still, you shouldn’t write these articles, some people might actually get worse from reading this. I don’t know if you’re doing that unintentionally or if you just enjoy being cruel. I would advice deleting this before causing any serious damage to people
Relapse is real. If it scares you to know that then this is based on your own fear not my “cruelty.”
I’m having a relapse now after 6 years almost anxiety free. I think I’ve been getting caught up in the why? how? why me? thinking again and now starting to accept that it won’t help me to feel better. I’ve had a stressful year and I have removed some of that stress now so I just need to accept the way I feel and know that however long it takes, it will eventually pass. It can be hard to accept that you might have a relapse at some point but it’s all about acceptance of the fear, I won’t let it beat me. I won’t fight it because it will just make it worse but I am letting it come along for the ride. I’m doing the driving, the anxiety is just an annoying and unpleasant passenger!
thanks for this post – It really helps me when I need a boost to get through a tiny relapse….its encouraging, truthful and hopeful…thanks again
I love this post it really helps me so I guess for all the people it upsets there are as many lifted by it
I have struggled with arrrgggh for 30 years with all the up and downs. If people are cured then that is the winning ticket. Don’t think that’s for me though arrrrgggh is me and stressing over a cure makes me worse ! So I try and accept. It’s very hard at times.
Suicidal hard but so far still here
Relapse is real..i ve been free of panic atacks for more than 1 year..and i ve been in one very fuck up situation but acting perfectly chill..but now out of suddenly it comes back..i will get better again,and this time i will take care of myself..after i get free from anxietyy i drink almost every day ,didint sleep and eat only garbage,even someone without without the condition will get sick..so There is ablsolutelly a cure for anxiety,important is how you will live after you get better,we need to take care of ourselves ,and everything will be ok..
Thank you so much for a frank and honest post. Really gave me a lift during my current spike! Bad nerves in particular gave me a laugh! 🙂
Hi Paul.
Thank you for this. I am currently 3 days into a relapse. I have made notes and will not be a victim tomorrow. Thank you
I’ve bookmarked this post to help with my current and inevitable future relapses. It’s exactly what I needed to hear
I am in the midst of the first relapse in many, many years. First anxiety attack a few weeks ago I thought was a fluke and a day or so later I felt just fine again….but over the past 2 weeks, I definitely recognize the old symptoms. I had been on a tiny dose of prozac for 20 years, figured it would remain that way and I was very stable. I didn’t know that relapse is possible and quite common until today when I spoke to my psychiatrist, who recommended a much more therapeutic dose of prozac. In the meantime, a little valium helps me get through. Hate this.
After 30 plus years of relief on maintenance dose of meds I find myself in a relapse. All the horrible physical feelings and bad thoughts are so hard to accept after being so much better for years. I do know how much I can increase my meds to a dose that I was on mant years ago. I’m doing that now but can only increase slowly a few days at a time. Your post was excellent and good to know this can happen and I will get over it again
I’m glad that I have the internet and that I can find people having the same problem as me. Having my first relapse after an entire anxiety free year of first being diagnosed with panic attacks and it’s been a few days. It’s tough… but I’ll get through it!
Hi Paul
I really like your post! It’s just so true. Anxiety is life long and we need to learn to just run with it when we have a relapse. I have been unwell and that always seems to trigger my health anxiety even though I’ve been on celesta for 2 years now and have generally been heaps better. It’s the winter here too and I am always at my worst in winter. I have to stop myself from making every symptom a terminal illness! Weak legs – must be MS or Guillaib barre, bad headache – must be brain tumour. Your post is helping me to put things in perspective – something I find really hard to do when it comes to my anxiety!
I just recently started having an anxiety relapse last week for the first time in two years and I just want to thank you for writing this article. It has really improved my situation and it helps to know I’m not alone in this fight.
After 8 years of being almost totally anxiety free my anxiety hit me like the hammer of Thor 9 months ago. I am far better but I still have a ways to go. Some people are angry with paul for this article but all he’s doing is telling the truth. Anxiety flares up like many conditions do. I think instead of saying “I’m gonna beat this and will be rid of it” the better thing is to accept it as part of you life like having a limp or cough. It is what it is and like paul said for most of us it’s lifelong. Don’t despair because most of us will have many anxiety free times. I had 8 years so i’ll be happy to get a few more couple year runs in my life where i’m at peace.
Hi peeps, am having a relapse too after 6 years of, I won’t say anxiety free years years but 6 good years without breaking down. My issue is that am 18 weeks pregnant, i hv a 18 month old to take care of , the anxiety hit me abt 2 months ago and despite progressing slowly on meds and therapy am having lapses each 2 weeks 🙁 it’s really really hard… What Paul has written is really a fact and I think the faster we accept it the better for us. Thumbs up to al those goin thru this, we will make it…
So helpful. Thank you.
Thank you so much for this post. I know it’s kind of an old one but it is tremendously useful for so many of us that have an anxiety disorder. Even as a mental health counselor with all the education and tools available, I tend, in a relapse time, to forget that this is a life-long management deal and that the cause of the sudden onset is less important than how you handle it. Thank you : )
Couldn’t have read this at a better time. I had an 8 year, mostly anxiety free streak. This was a wonderful streak following 13 years of anxiety,panic and agoraphobia. It’s been a week, and when I look at it through a realistic lens, it’s nowhere as terrible as it was back then. I’m just going to ride it out, feel it and not fight it. This too shall pass. It always does.
I have anxiety, herpes, AND bad knees.
Just kidding. Okay, not really. But I’m glad you wrote this article because I’m having an anxiety relapse and it still sucks, even with a 35+ year history of anxiety, depression, PTSD and personality disorder (and herpes, and bad knees).
YAY! 🙁
Was having a slight anxiety relapse feeling this morning and stumbled across this post. It’s an oldie, but so spot on. It ultimately all boils down to learning acceptance of the condition. I don’t take much heed from people who talk about cures or being cured of anxiety. Not saying it isn’t possible, but after some 20 years of having experienced different ebbs ad flows of anxiety, I feel it will always be with me in some shape or form and that all I can do is change my relationship towards it. Like many things in life, quick fixes would be nice, but for long-term substantial change, you need to put in the effort and be patient about results. I make sure to incorporate exercise, good diet and mindfulness meditation in my regular practices and I am finding that as I go along, my recovery rate is improving when I have relapses and they don’t hit quite as hard.
Thanks Paul. I relapsed. It’s a reminder that this is a condition for life, but like in the past I can get past this stage. I just discovered your podcast, I enjoy them and find them helpful.