To feel persistent fear is to be miserable, to feel sad because of fear is painful, to feel alone is what anxiety can make you. But it isn’t simply the fear, sadness or isolation that bends our will and weakens our resolve. No, it’s more than this. It is the final culmination of all that we hate about anxiety – the final turn inward, the path away from the outside, away from what we all understand as normal and inside our minds in search of a way out.
What then can we implement to counter this inward, self reflective, even self-absorbed disposition (mental chatter)? We really needn’t search that hard for the opposite of fear and isolation, it is simply compassion. The practice of compassion toward those around you will lead to change because the act of showing compassion requires one to respond to the pain of others and to literally get outside oneself. To be compassionate is to share in someone else’s pain, problems, life. Practicing compassion, on a regular basis, can help us escape ourselves, as well as to avoid and reduce the nagging mental chatter that is generated by anxiety, fear, depression, and illogical thinking. Frankly, living a compassionate life can, and in many instances will, negate the self pity, hopelessness, and fear you live with.
But how can we possibly be compassionate when we are living under the weight of anxiety? Is this the magical spell you’ve been waiting for? The silver bullet you’ve been praying for? It’s been said that only drugs can affect change in people with anxiety, or that it is medication and therapy that is needed. I wouldn’t argue with this at all and instead think that this can work for many people. But the more simple, obvious, effective, and useful techniques that can be used to challenge our anxieties are often not considered or worst yet, ignored. The truth is, there are alternatives that also have worth and deserve consideration.
Living a compassionate life can bring to bear the things that we often lack in our lives: patience, peace, acceptance, empathy. This is contrary to the fear, sadness, uncertainty, low self esteem, and constant apprehension that anxiety fosters. Have you ever consoled someone that was crying? Have you ever provided counsel to someone with a serious problem? Or just lent your ear to a person that needed to vent? I suspect that in the vast majority of these cases you were not thinking of yourself. Instead, you were empathizing, offering support, and most importantly you were outside of yourself, outside the influence of negative mental chatter, self doubt, and the creation of new anxieties.
Such then, is the power of compassion. Let me give you another reason why compassion works to change a person’s mental state. If a person practices compassion, mindfully and with purpose, would it not then follow that the empathy, patience, acceptance, and understanding that is being practiced could influence their perspective on how to handle stress and anxiety? Yes, indeed they would. You see, by practicing compassion, by reaching out to others, you not only escape your tendency to look inward but also you will develop the very skills you need to be compassionate with yourself. You will learn to heal yourself.
I am not so sure that there is a single cure for anxiety disorder(s) of any stripe. I am certain that doing many things in conjunction is more likely to help one cope. Shine a light in your inner self by opening up to others. Simply because those that do not find ways to impede their constant self evaluation and subsequent torment shall continue the cycle they’re currently in – around and around with no end in sight.
Compassion is yet another means of coping. It is a way to connect. It offers altruistic results while also soothing the giver. It is an anointed emotion. It is to feel pain and give joy. Be compassionate.
mary Soukup says
Oh my God. this is just what I needed to I I will be wrting about this in my blog and will be llinking to your blog. Thank you