I don’t know what you’ve been told about curing abnormal anxiety.
But whatever it is, it’s only half-true.
Because of all the countless ways to cure abnormal anxiety, not one will help everyone to the same degree.
Long story short. There’s no easy answers except to say that you need knowledge to fix bad nerves – very specific knowledge (Please see the archives to get an idea).
But that’s not all. You need more.
It also takes new ways of understanding what you already know.
When I used to read something that made sense about curing my anxiety I thought. “This is it, finally!” The result though, usually months later, was that I wasn’t any better then before.
Then I’d get impatient and thought all the learning I was doing was worthless.
I was, of course, wrong.
The information you need is out there. In books. On the net. It’s all over the place.
But it’s important to know that there are several ways of understanding what you learn and that’s just as important as the knowledge itself.
It’s like when you watch a movie over and over. You see new things every time you watch that same movie again. Learning about how to heal anxiety is the same way.
You might feel like much of the information you’re reading is the same, and some of it is, but as you absorb that knowledge time after time, you end up with a clearer picture of what you need to do to get better.
That’s the “magic” you need. Repetition.
If all you needed was information, you’d be done already. But here you are. And that’s totally normal.
That doesn’t mean that getting better needs to take years, either.
That can happen in weeks, months, or years. It’s up to you.
Here’s what I recommend:
1. Learn as much as you can about abnormal anxiety.
2. Learn it from different places (no one has all the answers, just pieces).
3. Be consistent
Of all the ways that you can heal abnormal anxiety, this is by far, far, the best way.
There are other ways too. There are medications, meditation, exercise, spirituality, and much more.
But I believe real healing, the kind that lasts a lifetime, happens when you can understand, really understand, what you’re going through.
Being consistent can be difficult. I think for me, at times, I’ve read or feel I’ve read the same things so much my brain seems to shut down. I can acknowledge that I’ve read something and that I understand what I read, and I even agree with what I’ve read and get frustrated that the same ole thing just re-occurs. What was it that Einstein said? “Insanity-doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” It’s like my conscious and unconscious is not in-sync with each other.
What you speak of Sylvia has to do with acceptance, and that’s another can of worms altogether.
Bringing the two together, knowledge and acceptance, is the ultimate goal.
I had thought I had accepted what the issues are? So the secret is how to accept?
This post is spot on and one of the best I’ve read in a while.
I’ve had these eureka-moments a lot in my life. Everything felt good and then a few days later…Life would be bad again.
Recently I’ve noticed that it’s all knowledge and understanding were creating. Like were building towards a goal.
I try to read a lot as well. Creating more knowledge always works for me. Like Thinkand Grow Rich from Napoleon Hill and I occasionly check winxtpo.com for anxiety programs that seem to work.
I’m not there yet but I notice more and more progress and the progress seems to be evolving more and more as well.
Hi Sylvia, I’d say so. Acceptance is the other side of what’s needed, how you do that is the tricky part.
It took me years to learn how to do it.
I’m currently writing an eBook about this exact topic.
I think that just telling people to accept isn’t good enough, so I’m pluging away on that right now.
Paul, you are correct, you can tell someone to just “accept” things as they are and it will not be of help for most, I believe. I’ve no doubt that most are trying to mean well when they say things like that. They really aren’t helping, it minimizes ones feelings and/or beliefs. I think acknowledging feelings is one of the keys, whether from yourself or from family/friends.
I can easily acknowledge others feelings, it is my own, that I have a hard time with. I see “myself” in a lot of what I’ve read. As I said: my conscious and unconscious is not in-sync and I haven’t figured out how to fix that.
Selvia,
Paul is right. It is truly about acceptance and the loss of fear. No matter what our unconscious does… once we re-wire our brains with the proper responses to fear, the unconscious begins to play along. You should look into TMS. (Dr. John Sarno, Howard Schubiner, etc.) There is a branch of mindbody therapy that deals with what you’re talking about.
But ultimately, it still comes down to acceptance… and a loss of fear.
You can’t fear what you accept. Some of us re-wire our brains instantly when we figure this out, and some of us need more time.
Paul has written about this many times, and done an amazing job. So have greats like Claire Weekes, etc. We can talk ourselves silly about this, and I’ve done that many times. 🙂 But, ultimately… it truly is about acceptance, and going on with life. There’s a message to be sent to our brain, our nervous system and unconscious that only we can send.
I’m not there yet, but I’m making progress. Hoping 2012 will be the year I finally break through for good, and I hope you all do as well. Thanks to Paul for another great article!
Paul or any of the friends please just explain what does accepting the anxious thought, anxiety mean. When you get a thought can you please explain clearly the full life cycle like as soon as u get the thought what do you think and do, what does reacting and not reacting actually mean. please please explain it. Assume I have a thought that “I am anxious and worried that how I am going to cope in office today with my anxiety”, once you have this thought how will all of you behave with this, what will acceptance mean,will you think over it at that point of time or will you not not think about it, if you will not think about it what will you think as this thought will be still lingering in your mind. Please please explain.
far be it from me to say anything, but I had to study how to treat my OCD because psychiatrists were bent on diagnosing me schizoaffective… and in my own right, I dont believe in that diagnosis… frankly… I think the ocd was far more worse than any schizoaffective disorder… the meds I take for the schizoaffective disorder never really showed any noticable change…but the cbt and zoloft (at first paxil) sure did….. I think my ocd is bizarre… really nutty stuff…. and all the drs get is their prized MD license..and my ocd doubt that I dont have Schizoaffective disorder… but I will prove it one day…whether I got SFD..than Just OCD. They will never do anything for the OCD anyways…so I got a gp giving me zoloft…. and it helps… not so much, but enough…