Have you just moved to a new town or city? Have you recently gotten married or started a new job? Chances are that if you have had to start something new your anxiety levels have gone up.
However despite your unease you should realize that such a reaction to any serious change in your life’s routine can and most likely will cause angst, among other things. This is a very normal reaction to anything that upsets the balance we have set for ourselves. This is especially true when you have an anxiety disorder.
As anxiety sufferers we like things how they are – minus all the nervousness of course. We like to do the same things over and over, go to the same places, eat the same foods, see the same people, etc. It’s not like all humans are not habitual in some way, its just that routine becomes all the more important when you are easily upset or made uneasy.
If a non-anxiety ridden person goes to a new restaurant for example he/she may not be all that happy about it but they can get on with it with very little effort. A person with anxiety however will have more of an issue. They may become nervous at just the very thought of eating at a new restaurant. An anxious person might say, "new restaurant? Where? Who is going to be there? Do I have to go?" The mind starts to swirl and you haven’t even left your house yet!
Now imagine moving to a new city. Moving into a new home, starting a new job, and maybe most significantly being far from your "safe people". Those friends and family that you have come to rely on for support and guidance. This can be a tremendous challenge, but one that can be dealt with effectively.
There are a few steps you can take to make sure that your transition will be a smooth one.
1. Keep in touch – This is a very basic but important concept. Do what you can to stay in contact with your safe crew. Whether that means getting on board with the same cell phone provider (cheaper or free to call at all hours) or using web cams and internet based communication like Skype to stay in touch.
You don’t want to use other people as a crutch however you also don’t want to cut yourself off. Nowadays keeping in touch also doesn’t cost an arm and a leg like it used to. Harness technology and keep everyone in the loop.
2. Bust out of your shell – Many of us have a tendency to be reclusive but when it comes to new beginnings I suggest getting yourself out there. Shake hands, smile at people, and don’t shy away from conversations with new people.
The more you try to be personable and approachable the more other people are willing to return the favor. This in the long run can not only make the new people feel at ease but it will also put you at ease as well. Especially you males – don’t be the tough guy, open up a little and make your new surroundings apart of your new routine.
Get out and explore the new city, office, or whatever that new surrounding is. Don’t wait for things to normalize, show some initiative and in so doing build confidence in yourself.
3. Be patient – Things will not be "normal" right away. That new place won’t feel like home for a few months. That new mate of yours might also take a bit of getting used to. Whatever it is be patient with it and let things develop.
In the end though I want to stress that what you are experiencing when starting something new is – well stress. And stress promotes anxiety and vice versa. Cruel cycle I know, but a predictable one nonetheless.
When entering into a life changing event you have to expect some tough times but this does not mean that you need to despair. Also, realize that above all else anxiety can make you feel bad but it can’t harm you.
Make some minor adjustments to your normal, maybe even pessimistic, thinking and you’ll find that you are able to turn even the most undesirable situations into something great.
Leave a Reply